MR tissue, anyone?

This product is the height of stupid crap that will wither in your basement. And it’s not even Japanese cool stupid or Sky Mall stupid. It’s just stupid stupid.

A talking tissue box. REALLY?? But wait! The product description gets even better:

Talking tissue box. Each time you reach for a tissue, it imitates your illness with one of five sneezing and coughing sounds. If laughter really is the best medicine, this hilarious tissue box will have you feeling better in no time. Motion activated. Requires 2 AA batteries (not included).

A few problems with this description:

“Talking tissue box…with one of five sneezing and coughing sounds”

If I really wanted a talking tissue box to help alleviate my illness, I’d like to give me some actual advice about how to get better…not just cough back at me. Where are your manners tissue box??

“Imitates your illness”

Hmm. Sounds like a recipe for a viral plague to me.

“…this hilarious tissue box”

There is nothing hilarious about tissues or tissue boxes. Unless there is a joke written on it.

This type of irony upsets me. Though MR, you do not upset me.

HC Ben&Jerry's Free Cone Day 4/29!!!

To celebrate my 50th blog post (well, almost...) everyone gets free ice cream!!

AB Subway Crush

No, this isn't in reference to what happens to your toes when you're squashed on either side on the F train at 8:30am or 6:30pm.

Subway Crush is a much sunnier, prettier picture of the subway.

Pretty being the operative word.

It's a spin-off website of one of Craigslist's guilty pleasure features, 'Missed Connections.' Though I don't think Craigslist has anything to do with this spin-off.

This is the feature where you hunt and peck for a compliment like a needle in a haystack...hoping the guy that was checking you out in the line at Starbucks would be brave enough (and internet-savvy enough) to ask you for a cup of coffee via the anonymity of the internet when he didn't have the balls to ask you when you were already there...go figure.

Either way..Subway Crush makes it even easier b/c they keep your subway crushes organized by subway line and an 'address book' of your crushes (much like a little black book. except that you don't know these people. and you probably never will)...though I'd be curious to know the success stories of this dating approach.

So, like all good subway crush sites, Subway Crush delivers an organized way to check out people and think your lewd thoughts in real time and do the leg work in digital anonymity.

This marriage of the real world and the internet world...and integrating our insecurities with how we can circumvent them is why the internet is so awesome!

DN is Game. 3:Fri., April 25: at Dallas, 8 p.m. ET (ESPN).

Spurs vs. Suns 2008 playoffs. This definitely deserves some attention. Also considering every San Antonioan that's in my network has been pumped, psyched and generally in awe-struck pride as we're racking up the wins. TWO-ZERO.

And victory is nothing like a 3 point buzzer beater...



It's on!!! Or, is it really even a competition anymore?

BC Brooklyn Botanic Garden

Hollah for the Cherry Blossom festival in Brooklyn!!

If you'd like to be surrounded by soft, tissuey pink things....the oriental flowering cherries bloom until mid-May. Catch the botanical blossoms in a neighborhood near you!

SP is missing FIESTA in San Anton :(

San Antonians take their parties seriously. And the biggest party of the year that lasts a whole freakin’ week and a half in April (18-27 this year)...is FIESTA! And it literally means party in Spanish. Awesome. Better to just to get down to business.

Cervezas (beer), salsa (the dancing AND the dip), and all kinds of parades and floats transform downtown San Antonio into a whirlwind of confetti and debauchery. With over 100 events like the Oyster bake, the Battle of the Flowers parade (we actually get a day off for this!), and NIOSA (Night In Old San Antonio where the goal of every high-schooler is to make out with as many other high-schoolers as they can) revitalizes the city’s spirit.

I always kind of hated San Antonio growing up. Not that it’s a bad place, but its just the place you grew up…so its…very, ‘eh. But, visiting FIESTA through the official website conjures up nostalgia for a city that’s truly diverse, colorful, vibrant and is adamant about its sense of community (a week and a half kind of adamant in fact). Viva Fiesta!!

AD Mixtape mentality

Dear AD,

Have you Muxtapped??

Muxtape is a pretty sweet spot on the web where you can travel to a simpler place and time...when mixtape love was ribbons of musical data encased in plastic.

Except Muxtape makes it easy because you don't have to muss with all that 'play' and 'record' at the same time and other such analog hassles. It's just straight up mp3's...compiled and shared.

Peruse through other folks mixes or create your own to share your talents in the 'art of the mix'.

With Muxxers like, 'Electricgee', 'Boombox', 'Goldenfiddle', and 'Skullflower', how could you not trust these people for exceptional music rec's?

Rock on.

pv

SK is really pissed off at Sprint PCS who wants to charge me $400 to cancel my phone lines.

Cell phone companies....It's like signing a contract with the devil.

Two incidents that bring me great sadness:

EPISODE 1.

I was having the WORST month. Ever.

And on this day, I was supposed to skitter to NJ, come back to NY, then go to Boston...all in a 12 hr period. Not bad, except that my cell phone was out of juice and the charger was nowhere to be seen (of course...). It's cool. I'll just walk over to the T-Mobile and power myself up for a bit.

I get there. The manager opens fresh Saturday 10am doors. There was hope in the air. Everything was going to be okay.

Except it wasn't. Because I was dealing with a cell phone company (of course...).

This manager, who looked just like Ludicrous, was behaving just like that…LUDACRIOUS!

He refused to charge my phone…he suggested that I can buy a charger…I agreed…..I just realized I lost my wallet…can’t…find...it…anywhere!!!!!!.....I’m begging him now….he looks at me with those cold, beady eyes…”I can’t be doing this back and forth”….”You’re not serious??”….”Oh, I am, it’s store policy. And I can’t keep telling you that”….I stormed out of the store screaming HUMANITY!

Why the F&*K am I spending $70+ a month if my providers of communication can’t lend me 70cents worth of electricity to communicate?!??!

Episode 2.

I recently lost my phone in the mountains. It is probably in the tummy of some bear by now. I wasn’t too keen on hunting down the bear to retrieve my cell phone.

I figured my cell phone company would value me as a customer and give a good deal on a new phone. WRONG.

It doesn’t matter that I’ve spent $1260 padding T-Mobile’s pockets thus far…only the NEW customers…the one’s who’ve spent $0 are the ones that can get the $29 phone.

Watch out suckers…about 13 months from now, when the honeymoon period is over…that same puppy will be 8 BILLION dollars!

I would have had better luck with the bear.

Feel free to share your worst cell phone company story! Let it all out...you'll feel better.

UD Bone Thugz & Harmony has broken my writer's block! --yes, I had to dig That deep...

Let's take it back ol' skool...

DK is drinkin' jamba juice ehh should of stuck to carribean passion :(.

Is a smoothie a meal or a snack??

In this berry crushing, Whole Foods shopping, soy protein culture...I haven't figured this out yet.

But according to the nutritional facts for a SMALL carribean passion at Jamba Juice...it's a thunderous meal!

I have also become VERY dismayed the past few weeks as I've researched the nutritional values of my lunch escapades....quiznos 12 incher = 1000+ calories..and chipotle = forget about it (even the veggie is hovering around 800/900 cals).

This guilt has slowed me down a bit...but, it still ain't gonna stop me!

TS is now a believer of the El Patio Blue margaritas

A good margarita can’t be reckoned with. A great margarita, well, that’ll give you the confidence to get up on the bar, swirl out a few dance moves, and belt out yelps for “PATRóN!!!” when patron is the LAST thing you need.

That’s apparently where the blue margarita will take you. To that special place… Margaritaville via El Patio in Houston, TX. And you might just have dreams of Jimmy B. lulling your spinning head to sleep…right before you puke.

(Tequila is my ENEMY!)

SV anxiously awaits the opening of the first NANDOS in amurika

First off, we need some clarification.

Knowing SV and her penchant for turning on very ugly accents ;), amurika = America.

NANDOS!! In Amurika!!! Ya’ll. If you haven’t tried it, this is SERIOUSLY good stuff.

It’s the global fast-food chain of awesomely flavourful (global spelling!) stuff—chicken, fries, cous-cous, rice, and burgers, all with a Portuguese kick and South African roots (it’s healthy too!)

I first was Nando-nized in South Africa and fell in LOVE with their peri-naise and perfectly roasted, toasted fries.

They’ve been holding back from opening a store in evil America, but I’m SOO happy that they’ve clearly buckled to our extravagant spending and we’ve earned our privilege to this succulent food.

So, why am I going on and on? Because it’s all rooted in one simple secret. Peri-Peri.

As a former writer for Church’s chicken, and a vegetarian, I know chicken (only through juicy adjectives), but! I hear it just absorbs the taste of whatever it’s doused, soaked, and grilled in. And PERI-PERI is the shit!!

Peri-who? Yea, that’s right. The American Non-Nandonise's have been so oppressed, we don’t even know. It’s the pinch of African bird chili in this dusting of spices that’s all the rage… (and it’s also all the rage for your libido, endorphins, and covers your need for vitamin C).

So chickens in America, get ready to be dressed up and basted in some spicy, flavorful, sauce and cozy up to the open flame…your time has come!

HR Note to self - Aether 216

It's time for some San Antonio pride!! Check out this Texas based artist, Diego Chavez—a.k.a. Aether 216.

Not only do the deep beats, sexy vocals and layers of samples give your ears something fresh to soak in...his art is pretty dope too (he also inspires me to use words like DOPE!)

MI why are copy machines such tricky bastards

Probably because people like this keep fussing with it...

NK is down with Senor Lessig

“Who can change congress?” “We can” “No way” “I hate Clinton” “Obama’s youtube video sucks” “Can you please pass that yummy custard??”

This was the tone of the conversation that was taking place moments after our friends exchanged vows a few weeks ago. Instead of rejoicing in the hope we just witnessed, we were mired in political frustration and in my case, total apathy.

But thank god there are some people who don’t think it’s hopeless. Meet Lawrence Lessig. He’s taken on the challenge to help develop a system where congress is actually accountable for their funding and in turn their actions. Gulp.

Change Congress is “a national movement to end corruption in America’s congress.”

Senor Lessig took a very “DUH” approach in how to make congress more responsible for their actions. He simply helps put a spotlight on their actions and intentions, internet style. Double gulp.

Each congressional leader is asked to create a very simple online pledge that will either “Yay” or “Nay” their interests and put them on a map. Here are some questions they can answer:

* Refuses PAC money
* Refuses lobbyist money
* Supports abolishing earmarks
* Supports Congressional transparency
* Supports publicly-financed campaigns

And…if they don’t sign a pledge, they just end up looking shady. Brilliant!

This is the kind of accountability that has been missing from congress…and with the democracy of the Internet there is actually some hope for our very own democracy.

Please read the “about” section for a more detailed description of pledge questions.

The idea has been born and the system is in place. Now, we must seed this for the accountability to be real.

And you can also sign your very own pledge as a citizen. You can be responsible in a real way…yea, YOU (and me too...). Here's my pledge (click on it!):



My famous excuse to explain my political apathy is now rendered obsolete.."I don't care because I don't know what's really going on behind the scenes."

The curtains have been drawn. Now can you please pass me the custard??

ZC respect

Merry Christmas Grandma...thanks for the f*&%$NG taffeta gowns.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/lalagirl/2113662657/

CW wants to know if you've used couchsurfing.com before.

Nice..nice..and triple nice! Couchsurfing.com is an online community to connect travelers to the local community via their couches! It’s the idea of crashing on your friends couch for a few days, but like global…and with strangers…this is EXTREME couch surfing!

It’s headed up by a non-profit whose belief is:

“CouchSurfing is not about the furniture, not just about finding free accommodations around the world; it's about making connections worldwide. We make the world a better place by opening our homes, our hearts, and our lives…We create deep and meaningful connections that cross oceans, continents and cultures. CouchSurfing wants to change not only the way we travel, but how we relate to the world!”

Really great idea…just hope it doesn’t turn into scandals on the 6 o’clock news. This is a test world!! Come on...you can do it...don't be creepy! Just spread some good old fashioned love...(and I don't mean chlamydia)

HA Canadian PSA

Canadian peace strategy: scare the shit out of people.

AK Super Pi Pii Brothers

Japan has done it again. Officially. I thought the mannequin lap rests (with skirt!) were weird, but cool.

And the vending machine costumes for women to cloak themselves as an astute concern for women's safety on the streets (can you spot her feet??).

Japan rox! And their thinking is unsurpassed...but, what were they thinking here??

The new wii game...Super Pi Pii Brothers. No joke. Women (or anyone) can wear a strap-on type device to emulate, stimulate and postulate peeing. But its not as easy it sounds. Usual troubles at the stall can ensue. Japanese style.